So, okay, not at all fat related, but I’m fat so, whatever!

Sunday & Monday nights of this week I spent with B & The Puggyman watching an old VHS recording of MTV’s ultimate Alternative countdown from 1996! It was hosted by Gavin Rossdale and Nigel Pulsford of Bush. Holy epic music, Batman! It was so fucking great! Fifty of the all time best alternative music videos! I loved every second of it, even the horrible 90’s commercials!

Actually, many of the commercials mentioned the year, 1996, which I found odd. Do commercials still do that? Weird. Anyway, some of them were fucking hilarious, Beeperman from Beeper City!!! And others were just icky, ITT Tech’s barrage of rejection for not having “experience” and so you better go to their silly school. Whatever! Some of the hair and beauty products ads were great. Like Finesse had this one where it was like, “Get flowers on your birthday? That’s too easy! Get flowers everyday? That’s Finesse!” I was like, “OMZ I gotta get me some Finesse!” B looked at me and said, “You WANT flowers everyday?” and I replied, “Um, who said anything about want? It said I could get flowers everyday!!!” Ha!

It was a bittersweet thing though, watching my youth represented and flashing before me, and my old idols and hearing the lyrics of my very soul in such a blast from the past sort of way. *Sigh* So many greats now gone, so many great guitarists lost to obscurity. It seemed to me that this was an era of effort, of violent expression of self and not holding back an ounce! Especially the band Live! Holy shit! They rock out hardcore, y’all! Ha-ha! But seriously? They rocked! And it showed.

I feel like everything is just for show now days and the music industry barely exists and in some ways I’m glad for that. And let’s  be real here, I think there was all of two female fronted bands out of fifty (Cranberries & Hole)! I mean, I don’t recall seeing Garbage, which is a damned shame if you ask me, or Veruca Salt or L7 or any of the other awesome kick-ass girl bands back then. 🙁

So, now I want to start a band and rock the fuck out hardcore! I have the lyrics in me, no worries there, but I can’t write a melody to save my life! So, if you’re game and somewhat local to me, hit me up and let’s do this! The world needs to get it’s ass kicked by our epic-fatty-rock-glory! Woooooooooooooooooooooot!