Who knew my most popular post by far would be this one: Fat Masturbation (Oh Yeah!) NSFW Ha-ha! It’s not even that risque! No pics, just text. Cracks me up but hey, let’s dig into this topic again, not for popularity’s sake, for our sake! Because fuck yeah!
I find it interesting that in most of the keywords used to find my blog (or that post in particular) is the different ways it’s described:
heavy set men masturbating techniques
Fat masturbating positions
fat girl masturbating
chubby girls masturbate post blog
How to masturbate if you are fat
…and so on
Part of me is like,”Hell yeah fat people wanna jerk off!!!” Another part of me thinks it’s just peeps lookin’ for porns. Wev. NBD. But it does make me think that folks are afraid or ashamed or feeling some feels about this perfect act of self care, imo. So let’s talk about it!
Who: You! Well, anyone, really. It may require different positions or accessories, but I’m pretty sure if you have the desire and the parts to do so, you can in fact masturbate! Way to go! Great start!
What: Your genitals. Though, masturbation doesn’t always have to mean direct genital stimulation. Perhaps you have another area that gets your motor going? I’m a big fan of nipples and boobs, myself. Great way to start things off! Or maybe you’re more of a butt connoisseur?! Get those hands on those cheeks and start rubbing and squeezin’ to your heart’s delight! Whatever it is, maybe take some time to see what you like or what’s new or neglected or whatever. Have fun!
When: When you have some personal and private time to do so. This is self care, but it’s what works best for you. Maybe you like it rushed so you feel more exhilarated. Or maybe you like to take a lot of time and get real relaxed first. When you can, you should make some time for yourself.
Where: This one is also pretty open, though let’s just all agree to not rub one out on public transport, cool? Cool! Thanks.
Why: Because you deserve to feel good. Because it’s good for you! Because it’s the safest, most pleasurable and most natural act one can do on their own. Because you can! Because you’re hot as fuck! You don’t need an excuse or a reason…just do you! (LOL! See what I did there?!?!)
How: Ahh! The good stuff! How?! Any way you like, really. But let’s talk about what hinders us or worries us…
I know for myself and other B-bellied peeps, a lower or larger (hanging or not) belly can get in the way of self lovin’. It can get in the way of partner sex, too, but this one is all about the solo stuffs. For me it was a lot of internalized fatphobia and self hate that made me ignore the existence of my belly for years. It wasn’t until I was single again after fifteen years that I finally learned to love this protrusion o’ mine and see it for the luscious sexness that it really is! While lovers helped this endeavor, it was my own willingness to be vulnerable with myself and be present and truly feel my belly that got me to see and feel so differently about it.
I started by just looking at my body in the mirror. Then I ran my hands gently, softly gliding them, all over my body. First just to see what felt good, but soon caught myself avoiding that B-zone. So I decided then and there “No more!” and rubbed and touched and tickled my belly. I tried to see it from an outsider’s perspective. This actually, surprisingly, helped a lot! Imagining/remembering lovers kissing my belly and caressing it definitely helped, too. Ha-ha!
As for positions, that will depend upon your own specific configuration of limbs, belly, rolls and abilities. Seriously, even the most athletic folks aren’t necessarily flexible. This can be an issue for anyone! I always suggest experimentation, patience, time, and being present. Does something feel better on your side versus on your back? What about on all fours? Can you reach better with a leg up? Or two? What about standing with one leg up on your bed or a stool? Have you tried the floor? A chair? The couch? I didn’t know I had a specific ability/quirk until I tried certain positioning of my legs on my own. Exciting!
What about toys?! Not just for ladies and not just bullet vibes…the world of adult toys is as varied and fun as your imagination can take you, and then some! Read the reviews online! Did you know Amazon even has an adult toy section? Get that Prime Membership working for ya! Ha-ha! There’s also Good Vibrations or other awesome sites for these products. It doesn’t hurt to browse and online you don’t need to worry about being embarrassed, if that’s something that would give you some embarrassment.
What about dressing up? Curvy Girl Lingerie is the most positive of places a sexy fatty can shop! The models are real people, some are my friends, and all shapes, sizes and ages, too! For non-femme-presenting folks, consider other ways of dressing up or down to suit your mood or taste! If you feel hot af in something, that is just the thing!
Setting the mood can be fun, too! Music is always a big one for me, and lighting. Maybe light a candle or put on a warm light nearby. Steamy shower fun can be the best, too! Let your fantasy world take over, no matter what your actual surroundings look like! The key is to tap into your imagination and let go of your worries and cares and just have fun and go for it…it being you!
My point is that we all deserve self love and self care. We all deserve to feel good and self pleasure is a great way to connect with your body in a positive way. This is also the best way to be a great lover with others, too. Knowing what you like and want and how you like and want it is vital! It will also allow you to focus more on your lover rather than worry about your own body. Even if you’re having a down day, giving yourself a dose of you-centric-pleasure can be just the thing to lift your spirits and brighten your mood and put a spring back in your step. And hey, it’s great for your heart, too! 😉
Rad Fatty Love to ALL,
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