Oh my sweeties! I have had one hell of a week, and it ain’t over yet! I know I haven’t been very posty lately, and I do apologize for that, but with all of the madness that is running your own business while also dealing with random maladies, well, it just happens.

I was doing my usual reading of various blogs in the fat-o-sphere and came across this list of the top 40 fat fashion blogs when I had a sudden realization: I may have fallen out of love with FATshion!

Please, don’t feel sorry for me. It happens to the best of us. Things do tend to wax and wane, yes? I just don’t know. I think it may have started when I went to Big Moves Bay Area’s Cupcake & Muffintops 2.0 last month. I was at first overwhelmed with what to look at and try on and buy and then mega-underwhelmed when a pile of bottoms (mostly denim & capris) did not fit. I did buy some tops, but left with the weight of disappointment on my shoulders.

Next was the “Kaden” boots from Target that were posted on LiveJournal’s Fatshionista community with the promise of affordability and fit for larger calves…alas, it simply wasn’t so (unless you wear a size 11). And finally, when I went back to Target the next day to try on this Converse One Star dress (I was so bummed by the boots that I left without perusing the plus clothes) and it didn’t fit either. Maybe that is when I fell out of love with fatshion.

Or perhaps it is entirely due to the fact that I no longer have any sort of personal income with which to buy anything over $10. I had to save my tips for an entire week for the Cupcake & Muffintops 2.0 last month. All $29 of it were spent there, too. Glad I went. I had an incredible dark chocolate cupcake and got to talk to so many lovely fats. But damn. When you look forward to something long enough I guess it just builds up in your mind until it cannot possibly live up to whatever it is you think it should be. Like those damned boots!

I hate to sound bitter, but I have wanted some knee-high boots to wear with dresses for over two years now. And with all of my internet resources, wisdom and secrets I’ve still come up short. And damn, those boots would have looked amazing in that Converse dress, yo! Ha-ha! Of course it all plays into my fantasy of creating the ultimate grunge (to me at least) outfit. I suppose in the truest sense of it though, the heart of grunge, was to made due with what’s available or cheap or handy and not about buying brand names and whatnot. And certainly the things I had wanted to buy were/are cheap.

There is another reason: My current closet/wardrobe situation. It’s a nightmare! I have a pile of things I want to sell, donate and reorganize but never find the time/inspiration/motivation to even tackle it. I know, I know…little steps. Commit to one small task at a time, thus less guilt to harbor. But you gotta know by now, I just don’t do things the easy way. And we have so much less space for things than we used to. With fall & winter on their way I am looking forward to digging out the cardis and sweaters and layers! Oh how I love layers! But I also live in CA and that means those are probably a bit far off for now.

How do you organize your clothes? By season? By occasion (formal/casual/etc)? I have a friend who organizes all of her clothes by color! She even has hangers that match each item! I can’t get behind that because it would drive me insane. But I am open to your creative suggestions or advice! Please, help me fall back in love with fatshion, even if it’s just my own wardrobe!

Thanks for reading.  =0)

*Listening to Presidents of the USA “Everybody wants to be naked & famous” and loving it!

You read that right! Today is Tank Top Tuesday! Weather you call it a vest or a wife pleaser (there shall be no violence here), I want your pics! This will be the first in a weekly offering of fatties with heads and arms wearing TANK TOPS! I just had such a great experience the last time I went out sleeveless that I thought this would be a fun way to keep that positivity flowing and also to hopefully help normalize fat arms!

That’s me, death fat and all, in an Old Navy Tank from about two years ago. I love the top, but so rarely wear it because the color doesn’t go with much. But I do have a gorgeous cardi that will go nicely when the weather cools down again.

Submit your photo by first commenting with your email address (just the first part/username, so I don’t spam you) then emailing me: notblueatall@notblueatall.com with the attachment and if you have a blog, please submit the web address so I can give you & it some mad props and any info you’d like me to include in the post. Please submit only one photo at a time. If I receive many I may do a special post or just post date them for the next several Tuesdays. If you have any questions, please leave a comment. I hope this becomes a very fun and continuing adventure for all of us. And guys!!! That means, you, too!  =0)

Wow! So, last night I was the guest on www.blogtalkradio.com/soulfulblend and what an amazing experience! The gracious and lovely ladies Adrienne & Rachel were so kind and sweet…I am still aglow from their compliments and love!

If you couldn’t tune in, well, you missed out! What else can I say? Ha-ha! No, I’ll recap for ya! I’m just cool like that. But it was so much fun and we discussed some pretty serious stuff, so I do think you should give it a listen, but no pressure. Ha!

Big Fat Summer Challenge: Originally posted on www.Tabayag.com
We discussed how hard it can be for a fatty to bare arms! Show her legs! And be okay with her paleness and beyond! From sleeveless to strapless, it was an amazing journey. You can read my final post here.

I was asked to tell my story and how I got where I am today. It was a bit bizarre to have someone tell me that I have this amazing and happy life. I mean, wow! But I am very blessed and grateful and I am happy and I think I have an amazing life. You can read my story here.

We talked about being in the moment and what that means and how to achieve it. I tried really hard to not be my usual long-winded self, so I boiled it down to two things: No time to worry, for me at least, when I have to make some busy mom her latte! And staying humble. That is something that seems a bit lost in modern society.

We talked about fat thrift shopping. I explained that I had sworn off of it since going into the larger plus sizing but had given it another chance after reading “Lessons From The Fat-O-Sphere” by Marianne Kirby & Kate Harding. And I found an amazing dress that fit like a glove. Lesson learned: Don’t look at the size on the tags! That dress is a 22/24 that I never would have even touched otherwise.

You guys! Sizing differs greatly from manufacturer to manufacturer. Of course this lead to different retailers sizing standards, too. Fun! Or not…From the Avenue to LB to Torrid, we discuss our experiences and gripes about being in the upper sizing range of plus size retailers who are supposedly catering to us, yet leave out those of us over a size 26!

We talked about Mad Men star Christina Hendricks not being able to find a dress for big events due to her U.K. 14 size. And I stand by what I said about it being a good thing as it brings attention to the reality of being a fat gal, star or no. And how bigger gals tend to fall into the over sexualized trappings that can happen.

We discussed the impact and how much we love “Drop Dead Diva” and “Huge.” Wish we had more time to discuss these, but we were already way over our allotted time, I think.

And the coolest of the cool: we came up with a fat-club/gang sign of our own (inspired by the U.K. Chubsters! <3) by holding your hands in a heart over your fat belly! BELLY LOVE! WOOT! (It’s actually harder than it looks!)

I will surely be tuning into future episodes and who knows? Perhaps they’ll invite me to be a guest again! You know I have a lot to say, about anything! Ha-ha!

Please support & follow these amazing ladies:
On Twitter: @ohyesfashion On Facebook: RURealIAmPlus

Thanks again ladies, you rock my socks! =0)

So in my last post I mentioned trying to get a great goth outfit together in time for this weekend. My BFF & I are hitting up our local goth club in San Jose for their annual bash. We go about once every 6-9 months and have been for the last two years. The first time we went it had been 11 years since I had been to a goth club. I didn’t know what to expect at this new club and since I was much larger in size than the old days I struggled with finding cute clothes for it.

I threw together some black slacks from my old corporate days (LB’s Madison trousers, how I loved thee) and a cute red tee under a black lace top from Avenue and some comfy black shoes.We had a total blast and that’s what matters, but we were dancing for four hours, y’all! It was hot and we were sweaty as hell. And that outfit? No good for dancing!

The second time we went I managed to find an etsy seller to make me a custom skirt which I LOVE! I paired that with a black Old Navy top and some hand dyed (by none other than Marianne Kirby of TheRotund.com) tights in bright red. I added my own little accents and voila:

It was cute, comfy and I danced my ass off! The only issues I had with this outfit were the ribbon & lace gloves I had made, they kept coming untied, but my lovely BFF was right there to help. Such a sweetheart! But when I posted this outfit on Fatshionista (LJ community) I got a lot of “That’s not goth!” and such and while I had said I knew it wasn’t traditional goth, I thought it more of a Tim Burton/circus goth. Wevs. I love this one!

The time after the above outfit, I wore a similar style top from Torrid, but it had white lace around the neckline and fell off my shoulders so much that I finally stopped caring and just let my bra straps be seen as they were. Ha! I don’t remember if I wore a skirt or pants. I sadly, don’t have a picture, either. Boo!

Now I want a full-on Loli-goth (Gothic Lolita or Victorian style inspired by the lovely and gorgeous Japanese trends) outfit though. But dammit if those aren’t the most expensive of things to get. And well, I did find someone on eBay who does custom ones for like $80 (Not bad at all, trust me!), they are in Asia and thus wouldn’t work for my goth night this weekend. And I never have that kind of money to spend on a damned thing. Ha-ha!

So, I am not trying to figure out a way to create my own version of this. I have some ideas, but I fear I’ll be treading in the non-trad-goth waters and well, part of me doesn’t care but part wants to look like the cool kids, ya know? But without an income I just can’t get the sweet threads I long for. I have minimal sewing skills, but I do have a sewing machine.

I was thinking of wearing this Torrid top with a Victorian collar, but it’s a t-shirt ish material and so would the skirt I wear with it. Is it okay to double up on the jersey knit? For dancing? I’m hesitant. The tights? They rock! They’re so comfortable that I will probably wear them again and again until they die.

Also, if you know of a gorgeously bright red stay-put lipstick, please let me know! And a great red lipstick for someone of my complexion would be nice. Two separate needs actually. I’m clueless about makeup though, so I am in your hands.

So I turn to you brilliant lovelies, please, give me your suggestions and pics and thoughts and let me know what you think I could/should do for my upcoming goth night. I can’t wait!  =0)

Ask me anything: http://www.formspring.me/notblueatall

Reclaiming the word FAT: http://fiercefatties.com/2010/08/06/reclaing-the-word-fat/

Putting an end to fat talk: http://the-f-word.org/blog/index.php/2010/08/06/feel-good-friday-putting-an-end-to-fat-talk/

Scary facts about sugar: http://www.healthywomen.org/content/blog-entry/scary-sugar-facts-and-findings

Sara Rue loses 50 lbs. on Jenny Craig (insert my booing sounds here): http://tinyurl.com/239ua4g

Fall nail polish trends:http://tinyurl.com/276bedl

Fab new Ikea products (I’ll take one of each please!):http://tinyurl.com/294teks

Trailer for ‘Burlesque’: http://tinyurl.com/2erfof9