When I first saw the headline about a “popular clothing retailer closing 180 locations this year”, I chuckled and rolled my eyes. Really? Another retailer shrinking before our eyes? Shocking. Not! Then I actually looked at which one it was and laughed more genuinely. Look, I used to love Torrid back in the day. The old Torrid that was owned by Hot Topic, but not what it has become since diverging very much from that niche market. Capitalism is gonna do what it does and that is how things “work” in the US, but Torrid has been a thorn in our collective plus sized sides for years now. No one can be surprised by them openly stating that 70% of their sales come from online shoppers already. Is it any wonder when we try to go into a store and have to deal with fatphobia, bad attitudes from the obviously underpaid workers, coupon/discount/sales fuckery, only to not even have your size on the rack and have them offer to order it for you online?! C’mon! This isn’t even our first rodeo. Old Navy has done this shit a few times now. Target and Lane Bryant, too. 

While I understand the need for brick and mortar plus size stores to exist, they rarely fill the need they want us to believe they are there for. The state of plus size fashion options is abysmal, and that includes online shopping. Mostly because these large retailers don’t put in the R & D money to actually find and create the things we want and need to wear. We get the same recycled fabrics and cold shoulder cutouts only to be overcharged and treated like we should be grateful to have even scraps. I, for one, am not grateful. I haven’t shopped at those places in nearly ten years because the sizing started getting weird and suddenly you couldn’t find basic shit, just over produced garbage. At the time I felt a bit bulletproof because I had Eshakti as my ultimate option for great styles customized to my measurements. It was fabulous! Until last year when they fucked over their entire customer base. It still hurts to not have that option, but it is gone, and I have accepted it. 

If we are to be forced to shop online exclusively, then I will simply either go with indie brands with truly inclusive sizing or buy second hand. Fuck ’em! Second hand is better for the planet, my wallet, and my conscience. These larger retailers could actually put some effort and money behind their plus size lines, but they never do. When you realize just how much of the market plus sizes should be/are, it is astounding that none of these greedy jerk companies have stepped up to knock them all out of the water. When I heard that Anthropologie added extended sizing I was shocked, until I saw what was offered. They are all the same, they promise us inclusivity and more options, only to barely offer an actual full line in all of the sizes they claim to have. Somehow, retailer after retailer, for decades, cannot live up to their own expectations and then predictably turn it back around on us because we don’t want their fake bullshit. 

Fashion is supposed to be a fun form of self expression. Even ASOS, who you used to be able to count on to offer a few trendy pieces in larger sizes, has waned in their offerings. IT IS ALL SO BORING NOW! I refuse to put myself through the sad ritual of going to literally any department store to find something to wear. Or walk into any store at the mall to be met with that look on the sales clerks faces of, “Oh dear, you must be lost.” I think I am personally done with any and all of these settings, regardless of my purchasing needs. 

I know most plus size indie brands are not financially accessible to everyone. I also think we have been screwed over for so long by these big name scammers that we don’t realize the harm fast fashion has caused. I also know that most use better quality fabrics and stitching, and most try to pay livable wages for more local (to them) manufacturing. So maybe I will save up for a prized item to add to my wardrobe instead of the old LB hauls of yesteryear. “The haul” is over, excess is out, consumerism is no longer cool. I have fallen into those trappings, we all have. It can feel great at times, though always so fleeting. I no longer feel good at all about buying things. I no longer seek instant gratification from my spending habits. I no longer choose faster shipping options. I will wait. I have no urgency in my life, so it’s fine.

As we keep hearing threats of a huge recession/depression, and see big name brands close one after the other, it feels like a good time to buckle down and try not to spend. While many of these retailers have shot themselves in the foot in the name of thin body worship, not all is lost. I like eBay and Poshmark for my secondhand needs. and If you know your size in certain brands or stores, finding these items becomes much easier. I regularly search for old eshakti items or even long gone brands like B & Lu. They are few and hard to come by, but every now and then you can find a gem. For those who enjoy thrifting, you already know you can find some good stuff out there, if you just give it a try on without looking at the labeled size. There are tons of tips and tricks for this stuff, too. I am no authority on the subject. I just love fashion, always have. 

It might be time for me to get my sewing machine repaired and get back to experimenting with upcycling. I started following an upcycler on IG and I really enjoy his pieces. He often deconstructs say a blazer and then will reconstruct it with unexpected fabrics like lace and sections of pleats. Maybe it is time for me to MAKE the skirt of my dreams instead of being constantly on the hunt for it?! I have made a few skirts before, but only for dance show costumes, which don’t need to be all that durable. I don’t actually have any sewing skills, but I do like trying stuff. Ha! I cannot read a pattern for the life of me! I see this time as an opportunity to see things with a new perspective, a more sustainable and gentler one, too. I certainly have heaps of clothing I want to get rid of. And I have a bunch that just need some light tailoring. I think being pushed to the fringes of the fashion world has made these big retailer losses a lot easier since they rarely included me to begin with. 

Please do not assume I am shaming anyone for shopping at these places. I do understand that already limited options means we must often compromise in order to get on with life. I am blaming these shitty brands for being fakers and liars, but not the consumer who is simply looking to fill a need. Sometimes we just really need a thing and if all we have available to us is one store, then obviously that is where we’re gonna go to get it. Don’t beat yourself up over it. Seriously, I still catch myself getting worked up if I end up having to say get a bra from LB or tank tops from Old Navy. They are what is available uch of the time and no big indie brand is offering such basics, ya know? I just think if they are going to build these big splashy campaigns about inclusivity and extended size ranges, like if you’re gonna be about it, then actually be about it!

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I’m here for realness and sincerity, honesty and vulnerability, I’m here for the good and juicy bits of life that shine for me when I know I’m heading in the right direction.

Rad Fatty Love to ALL,
<3
S

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