No one benefits when we talk shit about other people. We are all guilty of it in some way or another. It is a form of judgment. We have got to let this shit go! If someone wrongs you, it is not a reflection of you. Someone else’s behavior is entirely on them. If someone is doing something with their life that you disagree with? Well, it’s their life. If you’re friends you should be able to calmly let them know how you feel, but do make sure you know the how and why of what you’re feeling before you do.
We need to support one another. We all share this beautiful and terrifying human experience and we can choose to connect and support one another. It is a choice. You can choose to shit on everyone you come in contact with and do your best to make people miserable, but why? Why put energy into something that won’t help, heal, grow or teach you? I just don’t get that mentality at all.
When we tear others down we close our hearts to love and possibilities. We allow our judgments of others to cloud our minds and we turn that same awful lens on ourselves. You know it’s not right. I don’t care what is socially acceptable in your life, you know deep down it’s not right.
I want to be a better person than those who have wronged me, who have lied to me, who have hurt me or taken from me. I want to honor and become my most authentic and truest self. I can’t do that by letting other people’s baggage weigh me down. I have enough to work through on my own and I am doing well with that.
I recently sat idle while listening to some people talk some heavy shit and it made me sad. I didn’t say anything. They didn’t know that I knew who and what they were talking about, but that isn’t the point. I could have said something, I could have at least changed the subject, but I didn’t. I also know, when asked for my opinion, that I am not always tactful and that this can come across as being negative or judgmental. But I will say for the record that what I say and my opinions of people and places and things are what I would say to those people in person and have.
I do not like secrets. I do my best to have none and to have no reason for them in my life. I can be trusted with others secrets, sure, but I want to live my life out in the open, unburdened by such things. I choose not to lie and not to keep people in my life who would or have lied to me. I know I expect too much of others but it is only because I push myself to be better and because I love them so much that I do.
I will do better by me and by those I care about when it comes to this stuff. I have to. I want to create the life I need to be the best me. And there is no room for hate in this life. There is no room for judgment and shame. I will allow others to do and live as they see fit and walk away from what isn’t helping, healing, growing or teaching me. It is hard, for sure, but it is necessary and it comes from a place of love and respect, for this world, for them and for myself.
Rad Fatty Love,