The other night my husband came over to help me change a light bulb and hang some stuff and originally to go out to dinner and grocery shopping. While he was hanging this little bulletin board I had, I noticed the piece of flowered stationary with “Sarah’s Measurements” on it. I looked at it a moment and said,”Wow! How cool and special is this? I have my entire body’s measurements right here where I can see them (by the light switch)! And my eye’s measurements, too (my prescription & frame measurements)! Who else has that?!”
Then I quickly realized why it is that I have said measurements: I cannot readily or easily find clothing that fits those measurements because I have been deemed an outsider by society and the fashion industry alike. It’s a sad realization when put out there like that, but it’s the cold hard truth. But the furthest thing from my mind, even in the moment I had the realization, was shame or anger. No, I felt fucking proud!
I felt proud that I might know my body more than the average person. Unless you need to know for a very specific purpose, it’s not something I’d imagine a person knowing or having handy. I will say that the main reason I have those measurements is for buying dresses on Eshakti.com, but having them makes all online shopping easier. And if you’re a fat person over a certain size, online shopping is where it’s at.
I mean, before ready-made clothing was the norm, everyone just went to a tailor. If I could afford such a thing now? I’d be all over this tailor business! Buying dresses from Eshakti has spoiled me! I always choose the custom sizing option and occasionally fiddle with custom styling, too (mostly sleeves). The dresses I wore on NYE and for Fatty Affair I had tailored and loved the result. So if this were an accessible option for me on a more regular basis I would absolutely take it. But it simply isn’t. I’m living on next to nothing right now. In fact without my husband’s support I would be up a shit creek without a paddle. True facts.
I know that many of you can still buy clothing in regular stores or are comfortable buying in your local Macy’s and Nordstrom or whatever. I have looked and maybe my local ones suck, but I haven’t found a thing in those stores.Sometimes I find stuff at Ross, but it is slim pickins if you ask me. I’m sick of Lane Bryant’s tactics and cheap fabrics (at ridiculous prices). Avenue has things I like sometimes, but because I’m in between their 26/28 and 30/32 it makes it hard to buy certain things. Don’t get me started on Torrid! Ugh! Anyway, my point is that having my own measurements has helped me get what I want and need to clothe and cover my body in fashionable ways.
I am on the lookout for some fabulous lingerie in my size, but thus far either don’t like what I find or it’s very expensive. I’ve actually have never been one for fancy under things, but I’m entertaining the idea right now. Especially when I’m already feeling quite sexy and want to have something like that handy. I’ve been looking on eBay mostly, but only because money is non-existent.
Funny thing, taking my measurements improved my life! How? Well, as it turns out, I was wearing the wrong shoe size for many years. I’d gotten to the point where I simply felt all shoes were uncomfortable and began looking into higher-end shoes for work. I was frustrated and annoyed and unfamiliar with all of the brands so I measured my feet using an online guide and my so-called 7W feet are actually 8′s! What?! I know! Nuts!!!
And now when I look at things like furniture or airline seats or anything at all, I have a much better idea of how much space I need and how things fit in the world. I like knowing things! It helps me understand stuff and gain a different perspective. Yay for that! It also helps me celebrate my unique self! Some may have similar measurements as me, but no one could have the exact same as me. Or they could! Ha-ha! And if they do, we should swap clothes!
I don’t place value, moral or otherwise, upon my figure or it’s measurements. I don’t care who knows that I have 63 & 3/4″ hips! It does not say anything about my worth or my intelligence. It says nothing of who I am as a human being. Part of me feels a bit more punk even telling people about this! In fact…
Back of shoulders: 17″
Above Bust: 47.5″
Under Bust: 48 & 3/4″
Waist (Natural): 54 & 3/4″
Hips: 63 & 3/4″
Arm Length: 21 & 3/4″
Arm Circumference R: 20″ L: 21″
I highly encourage you all to have a little fatty measuring party and have a blast discovering your bodies! I have measured many fatties and have felt the emotions pouring out in such a radical moment! It is empowering and difficult and can even be triggering for some. But if you support each other and laugh and smile and talk through it and crank up some good tunes, dance if you’re so inclined and just have a ball with it? I think you’ll feel as punk rock as me! I can feel proud of my relationship with my body. And I hope that you can, too.
Now if anyone wants to take these measurements and buy me all the Eshakti dresses in the world, I’d be totes okay with that! JUST KIDDING! I suck at accepting gifts, actually. But I am trying to enter a bunch of travel sweepstakes, so send ‘em my way if you know of any. Ha-ha!
If you have a moment and you’re on Facebook, could you do me a small favor and vote for me for this alternative model contest thingy? http://on.fb.me/y1FtFi Thanks!