NotBlueAtAll

I'm just a fat gal with a blog and an opinion. Well, lots of opinions.

Fatty Entrapment…

June8

Have you ever had someone try to call you out for being a “bad fatty?” It doesn’t matter the situation, person, activity, they were just waiting to tell you you’re wrong/hipocrtical/a bad fatty! Sometimes who it comes from is the more difficult part. It can be equally unnerving or uncomfortable if it’s someone close to you or a total stranger. I get the full spectrum operating my cafe everyday. You know that look? The one that says, “How could you be putting that into your mouth?” or “Should you really be preaching health at every size…at Your size?” and so many more.

When you are fat in public you just never know who will take it upon themselves to not only body & food police you, but even try to make sure you fall into some ridiculous stereotype. Heaven forbid a gal eats a donut! Even just once a year! Nope, we can’t have that! That’s “BAD!”  “You can’t be healthy and eat a donut!” “You know you won’t eat just one!” The fuck I won’t! And you wonder what special little joy they are getting from trying to shame/blame/other you. Anything in the attempt to seem better off, I suppose.

It’s sad to me that it must be reiterated daily/weekly/etc, food has no moral value! There is no “bad” food. There’s rotted food, sure, that’s bad! But not in the moral sense. What you choose to put into your mouth is your business and no one elses. No one’s! Not even your mother! Not even your BFF! Not even your Granny! Not their business! That’s it! Get it? You’re not a “bad fatty” or “bad” anything else. You’re just you! That’s all you can hope to be and that’s all I ever try to be.

Then there’s that look of pity or worse, disgust! The look that says, “How dare you breathe the same air or occupy the same space as me?!” The look that says, “Oh that poor dear! She must be out of control/let herself go.” Where? Where did I let myself go? Huh? Fatlandia? Fatterson U.S.A.?! Tell me! Where exactly did I let myself go? Out of control? Your judgment is out of control! I am in complete and total control over my own actions and judgments, thanks. I do not exist for you! I do not live to please! I live to live! I live to experience the wonders of this world! I live to love and to give and to share…what the fuck do you live for, huh?

Whew! Okay, sorry…went off a bit there. It’s just so frustrating to have people say things, even on the sly, about you because you look a certain way. I’m not interested in conformity! I’m punk rock! Conformity is for squares and suckers, ya know?! I didn’t get dressed in the hopes of fitting/blending in. I don’t hope to pass some non-existent grade you’re handing out. I don’t go out of my way to judge or hate anyone, so why are you? I just don’t get it. I mean, who cares? Who has the time?

Stigma is such a piece of shit! I’m sick of it. I think the most freeing thing anyone can do is simply to no longer care what other people think. If I am to be judged on face value alone? Not my problem! Because trying to fit into some existence that doesn’t want me just as I am, for who I am right now, does not interest me in the least. People don’t look up to others who did not stand out. No one says, “I really admire Shirley, she always seems to fit in and not make waves. That’s what I love about her!”

 You cannot control other people or the world in general. You can’t. You cannot do a damned thing about people perceiving or judging you a certain way. That’s on them! All you can do is just be you. Corny? Maybe! Fuck it! I don’t care! It’s how I roll and I have no intention of stopping. It’s done me just fine up until now, why stop a good thing, ya know? Ha-ha! To the lady who said to my friend, “Oh I know I guy who DOES eat cookies for breakfast. He’s your size!” What in the hell lady? What business is it of yours what anyone has for breakfast or what size they are? Fuck you!

What do you wanna tell the people who judge you unfairly? What can we do to wise people up when they confront us with this bullshit? I have an idea…if ever I’m called a name again, I shall resond, “Ignorant coward!” in the hopes this will confuse the poor dears. Yes, confuse! Their ignorance is cowardice! Their cowardice is ignorance. They are so afraid of fat and fatties that they feel compelled to shout from a moving vehicle or utter some slur under their breath? Coward! They obviously buy into all of that diet industry marketing bullshit. Ignorance! Lose the hate, not the weight! <3

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12 Comments to

“Fatty Entrapment…”

  1. On June 8th, 2011 at 7:34 am jery Says:

    Go on with yo’ bad self Punk Rock Ladyyyyyyyyyyyyy!!! Owwwwwwwwwwww!!!

  2. On June 8th, 2011 at 10:08 am Not Blue at All Says:

    When I read your “Owwww!” in my head it was all, “I don’t speak German, but I can if you like! Owwww!!!” Ha-ha! That it for real my fave song on that album! <3 ya!

  3. On June 8th, 2011 at 11:35 am Twistie Says:

    Damn, girlfriend! Get the hell out of my head! Ignorant coward is pretty much the thing I think in my head when people say abusive things about me out of car windows or as they race past me in the streets or from the protective comfort of a crowd I can’t take on all at once.

    And so with you on the dubious value of conformity. People get admired only when they do something more. Conforming is only good for not being attacked… and it’s of limited use then, too. Chameleons still lose to predators.

  4. On June 8th, 2011 at 11:38 am Not Blue at All Says:

    Yes! And don’t we all know that predators are everywhere?! When we appear meek and scared and sad or “trying” they see it and seek it out! (Just my opinion.) And I’ll get outta your head when you let me at that stove of yours! Ha-ha! Just kidding, I know it’s your love! How is Algy? Everything tippity toppity I hope?!

  5. On June 8th, 2011 at 11:55 am Twistie Says:

    If there is one thing I have learned in my rather morbid fascination with heinous and bloody crimes, it’s that no matter what your personality or physical type, there’s someone out there who would just love to hurt you because of it. So you might as well just be who you are, since being someone else is no protection whatsoever.

    Algy is lovely. He broiled me a lamb chop for dinner last night. He’s my dearie darling and I still pet him every time I pass. If my hands are full, I do it with my eyes. Merrrrrowwwrrrr!

  6. On June 8th, 2011 at 11:57 am Not Blue at All Says:

    Oh, you’re so right! And yay to petting Algy!

  7. On June 8th, 2011 at 11:58 am Veronica Says:

    I’ve kind of been thinking about what to say when I’m confronted with people who need to be taught a thing or two. Because an indepth conversation about FA and HAES isn’t always how it’s gonna go down, so I need a sort of bullet point version. I have one down, it’s “You can’t tell by their body what someone’s health is like” (it flows a bit better in Norwegian). In addition to this I need a short version of the many ways in which it’s possible to get fat. It’s always really affecting when I start listing different ways people get fat, because usually the person I’m talking to hasn’t considered any other way than the way the fat person/people they know got fat. Also, I need a way to tell people this http://www.weeshasworld.com/2011/06/haters-dont-have-to-hate.html because it seems to be almost impossible for a lot of people to grasp that it’s possible to live without judging other people.

  8. On June 8th, 2011 at 12:02 pm Not Blue at All Says:

    Yes, I know what you mean. I haven’t ever had an instance where someone shaming or policing me would listen to more than two words, so I’m not sure I can offer much help there.
    I love the blog you linked to! Thanks! I’m all about letting people know about living without judging others (and themselves)! Woo!

  9. On June 9th, 2011 at 3:56 am Psycho Sue Says:

    I can’t wait until someone says something dumb to me: i will make them cry in 3 minutes! CRY! CRY! FATTY HATER! CRY! MUHAHAHAHA!

  10. On June 9th, 2011 at 8:32 am Not Blue at All Says:

    I have no doubt in my mind that you could bring ’em to their knees! <3

  11. On June 10th, 2011 at 7:26 pm Kath Says:

    I’m all about “Mind your own damn business” to people who try to push me one way or another when it comes to my body, my food and activity choices, and my health. Because that’s what it all boils down to – it’s nobody’s business but MINE!

  12. On June 11th, 2011 at 8:46 am Not Blue at All Says:

    Oh yes! Seem to cut right to the point without explanation, too! Dead on, Kath! Thank you! <3

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