NotBlueAtAll

I'm just a fat gal with a blog and an opinion. Well, lots of opinions.

People will always show you their true colors…eventually!

June27

It’s true, people show us their true colors all of the time, but I’m quite certain that we ignore all those signals more often than not. It’s not in their words, usually, but definitely in their deeds and behaviors. I’m big on body language and pay close attention to the physical signals people give as they interact with me. It’s how I know who the fat hating bigots are at work and who’s actually super cool. Ha-ha!

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Friendships can boom and bust and grow and fade and we’re often left with more questions than answers. I know I certainly have been there, quite a bit a few years ago. What can you do? They showed me their true colors. They forced me to make a choice. They proved to be untrustworthy, or worse. I didn’t escape abuse to welcome it into my life willingly later on. Nope! Next!

Okay, but really this post is about my dating life because that is where I’m shifting some focus these days. What dating life, you might ask? Yeah, I know, I try and give up so quickly that it’s hard to keep up, let alone make any sort of sense of. That person I had that best first date ever with suddenly ghosted me for a week. It was odd, we had been texting every day for weeks. Really we had a terrible date, on a Friday night. Took them to my favorite Italian restaurant and they showed up late & high and had to leave an hour later because their wife was ill. And hey, I totally understood, but their behavior was bullshit. They barely talked and kept checking their phone. It was like a completely different person than the one I had had 3 amazing dates with. Oh well.

When they text me 8 days later with only, “Afternoon! :D” I waited two days to reply, “Afternoon.” I had thought to not text back at all, but I do love a bit of confrontation or at least to let them know I’m not into their fuckery. But no such explanation occurred, so what can ya do?! When they asked how I was I simply said, “Oh you know, just livin’.” and they haven’t responded since. I doubt they will. Too bad, they were a great person to talk to and a helluva great time to make-out with. Next!

Now I’m seeing someone else and having the time of my fucking life! This one is also married and open/ethically non-monagamous, but while the same age as the last one, far more mature and together. Their communication is open, honest and enthusiastic! And ain’t that just the way? People who want to be in your life will tell you, will show you, and will try their best to actually be in your awesome life! It’s almost like magic! And while this person and I get along swimmingly, the connection we’ve made in our short acquaintance is mostly physical (not to mention fucking fantastic! Ha-ha!). I’m not in this one for the feels and for the first time in a long time that feels right! It also FEEEEEEELS right! Ha-ha!

I had had a regular date a couple of weeks ago. I had matched with someone on a few different dating apps and had chatted a bit but it fizzled. Then they popped back up to apologize and explain and decided we should meet up. I was game, they were nice and cute and age appropriate (I might have a hangup about dating folks not yet thirty, wev!). We met outside of the local Egyptian museum in the garden, which was gorgeous as it was also sunset. However, they showed up sweaty in a tank top and shorts (cycling gear really) and checked on their bike twice in the not quite 90 minutes we hung out and chatted. I think we’re attracted to each other, but have very little at all in common. They had invited me to come to their apartment to play some Classic NES the following week but then never reached out to sync on the details. Oh well. Next!

Closure is a scam and we never truly get what we think we need. And the truth is we don’t actually need it! I know that may be a radical notion to some, certainly my own mind screams at the thought, but I’m certain of it now. Our brains will try as they might to finish the puzzle, especially if you have past traumas or PTSD-C as I do. Whew! My lil’ brain-o was on the struggle bus for real when the shit hit the fan at my last job. There was zero logic involved in how that situation went down, but my brain worked so hard for months to make it somehow make sense, but it never could because there was none to be had.

Our feelings are valid, regardless of the situation at hand. How someone makes you feel is real, but if their actions don’t match their words, be on high alert, my lovelies! It’s not worth sticking around for it to really kick you in the pants, I promise. There is so much more life to be had and experience and enriched! There are good people out there! Seriously! They may seem few and far between, but the good ones, the tried and true ones, they are always worth the wait. Trying to force it just never works and why put forth effort where it isn’t wanted anyway?! Nah, I’m done with all of that. I’m here for realness and sincerity, honesty and vulnerability, I’m here for the good and juicy bits of life that shine for me when I know I’m heading in the right direction. 

Oh well, oh well, oh well.
Rad Fatty Love to ALL,

<3
S

P.S. Check out and use the hashtag: #FatAndFree on Instagram & Facebook!

Check out the Fat AF podcast on your favorite podcast app for all things fat sex with me and my BFF, Michaela! (You can listen straight from the web, too!)

Donate to this blog here: https://www.paypal.me/notblueatall

My blog’s Facebook page for things I share that aren’t on this blog (updated daily): http://on.fb.me/1A18fAS 

Or get the same “shared” content on Twitter: @NotBlueAtAll

Are you on MeWe? I started a fat-feminist group there called, Rad Fatties Unlimited, look for it!

I also have an Instagram, though I don’t post much, I have been trying to: https://instagram.com/notblueatall/

And as always, please feel free to drop me a line in comments here or write me an email, I love hearing from readers. (Tell me your troubles, I don’t judge.): notblueatall@notblueatall.com

My Internal Battle Rages On

May28

I spent this past 3-day weekend deep in my feels, really digging and searching for something specific and figure it the heck out. It was an emotional rollercoaster in the realest sense, but I think in the end it was actually really good. I’ll start from the beginning, yeah? Ha-ha!
Saturday I got up and got ready for a coffee date that I was particularly excited about, but always with a grain of salt. I had dealt with a few flakes and once again took some time away from dating. It’s silly, but it’s just how I am, expand and retract. I get mad at myself for closing myself off to the world, and so I force myself out of my comfort zone in the hopes of proving myself wrong. I’m weird. I dig it. I was a lil’ nervous, which is rare for me. I’m at the point where it all feels pre-scripted and thus boring, though I always try to put my best foot forward.
Something about this person, this date if you will, got me hyped up! Which is rad! I even worried over what to wear but in the end I went with what I really wanted to wear, that matched how awesome I was feeling, over what I thought others would think is best. Note to self: always do this! I even shaved my legs which isn’t so weird for me these days, but before a first date was kind of odd. I guess I wanted to feel as good and look as truly myself as possible and I think I accomplished just that. Woo!
We connected on Bumble and had chatted online for two weeks or so. Conversation was light but it was obvious to us both that we should meet. I got to the coffee shop first though we were both running late. Some find this to be the worst offense, but we communicated and I appreciate a flawed human. So I ordered my espresso and bought a couple of nibbles that I ended up not touching until that evening. When they walked in I knew I was toast! I mean, they were like my ultimate 90’s, Joy Division fantasy come to life! Whew!
They wore a Neagan t-shirt (from The Walking Dead) with a black leather jacket and black jeans. Be still my heart! So they get their coffee order in and the conversation just FLOWED! It was so natural and we have so much in common it was surreal. When my parking meter ran out we walked to my car and then just decided to cruise. Neither wanting the convo to end, let alone the date itself or the good vibes we had between us. Then I asked if they’d been to Central Park (in San Mateo, not NYC obvs.) and since they hadn’t I insisted we meander about. We walked through the Japanese tea garden where I got married long ago. The place was alive with families and kids and pets, but we barely took notice.
When my parking meter ran out once again we cruised around some more and whilst sharing dating stories they immediately proposed our second date (this Saturday). On a whim I asked how they felt about cemeteries and when they had no feeling we went to my old haunt. Where I grew up there’s this old Union cemetery that I used to sneak out to make out with boys there in high school. I don’t know why it came to mind, but of course my head was already up in the clouds anyway. We pulled in and somehow Keanu Reeves came up in conversation and we shared a mutual admiration for that fine person.
We wandered through graves half gone from age, others appeared updated or renovated, and some from my memories were completely gone. We sat on a bench under a craggy looking oak tree and realized aloud how much we liked one another. I turned all the shades of red and couldn’t look at them for a bit, I’m not used to such open and honest communicate but appreciate it so much! Then we both admitted to having a time limit for dates, theirs (for first dates) is 2 hours, mine is 3. When I checked my watch it had been 4.5 hours! We decided to leave with our second date already planned.
I drove them home and when they went to get out I got out of my car to give them a hug goodbye. I was suddenly overcome with nerves and excitement! I hugged them and they pulled me close for a moment and it was like Junior High, the feel of that leather jacket in the sun pressed against me. *Sigh* And then they said, “May I kiss you?” and I replied, “Ohmigawd! Yes, please!” and I think that kiss made me fucking ovulate early! Ha-ha! WOW! It was electric and tender and perfect. I blushed hard and thanked them twice and we went our separate ways.
When I got home I gave them my phone number, another personal rule broken. (I wait until the second date for that as they are so rare it’s nearly pointless.) They asked if I was home safe, immediately. I sent them a pic of a tree in my neighborhood whose branches I adore. They asked if it was from our graveyard walk, but I clarified. We text well into the night, I was too excited to even try to sleep. We shared so much of ourselves and everything seemed to fit so well. And then a preference of theirs was shared as a deal breaker and for me it actually is a deal breaker. We explained our sides, but I’m not sure they understand the whole of mine and I’m doubtful they fully understand their own as they couldn’t truly explain it without seeing how ridiculous it all sounded.
I won’t go further into detail, but it was like reaching the highest altitude of joy only to descend very suddenly back to the earth. This was close to 2 am. We agreed to continue seeing each other and to see how things play out for us. I knew they were married already, but they are in an open relationship where both date other folks, so I didn’t give it much thought. I was distraught and at first devastated about their particular preference. It’s nothing seedy or gross, it’s just something I am not able to do.
The salad greens I was using the night before made me very sick the next day on top of my conflicting emotions. I had so much I wanted to get done and sort of tried to but ended up on my couch wrapped up in a blanket finishing up Better Call Saul on Netflix. Ugh! We text off and on, but while they still seemed very much interested, it was becoming apparent that my eagerness to see them again was not exactly matched, though it rarely is.
The next day I truly wrecked myself. I dove headfirst into my feels, plunged into my murkiest depths and forced myself to deal with some old shit that this person had stirred up. Honest to Zod I cried and swooned and wrote until the demons calmed the fuck down. I watched a bunch of great movies and shows that made me do more of the same. I watched Fleabag on Prime (OMZ!), Someone Great, About Time, and Pretty in Pink on Netflix. UGH! The feeeeeeels!!!! I wrote some more and then I was just fucking done!
When I read over the days writings I was surprised but felt good about what was there. I feel protective of those pieces today, keeping them close at hand, not even sure why. Likely because I’m feeling so tender hearted after all of that up and down this weekend. I feel more myself today now that I’m back in the office. I look fly as fuck, but that isn’t even the point. I think in the end I’m mad that I like this person so much. It’s so much easier to just worry about myself and the puggo and go about my life cheerfully. Now I’m stuck in this emo shit that I so do not want to deal with. Ha-ha!
So, I will keep at it, with this person, but more so with others. Why hang my hat on the first hook that seems good? They see others, why shouldn’t I? More to the point, I want someone just for me, if I’m going to bother with all these fucking feelings. It made me realize that I’ve never had a truly normal relationship. I’m okay with seeing where this odd one goes, but dammit if I’m gonna wreck myself over some dumbass human, it better be the real deal, honest and truly for me. I’m not opposed to non-monogamy, though I’ve zero experience with it myself, but I want to share all of me and have someone share all of themselves, too.
Maybe this one came into my life to show me I’m not truly dead inside and that there are folks I can trust to see me for me in the world. I want to believe this. I hate how difficult it is, or how it feels right now. They didn’t seem to want to see me sooner, despite the fact that neither of us had plans and just hung out at home separately the last two days. Ugh! Whatever! I’m fighting this out with myself and I guess only I can win AND lose! Hahahahahaha!
Oh well, oh well, oh well.
Rad Fatty Love to ALL,

<3
S

P.S. Check out and use the hashtag: #FatAndFree on Instagram & Facebook!

Check out the Fat AF podcast on your favorite podcast app for all things fat sex with me and my BFF, Michaela! (You can listen straight from the web, too!)

Donate to this blog here: https://www.paypal.me/notblueatall

My blog’s Facebook page for things I share that aren’t on this blog (updated daily): http://on.fb.me/1A18fAS 

Or get the same “shared” content on Twitter: @NotBlueAtAll

Are you on MeWe? I started a fat-feminist group there called, Rad Fatties Unlimited, look for it!

I also have an Instagram, though I don’t post much, I have been trying to: https://instagram.com/notblueatall/

And as always, please feel free to drop me a line in comments here or write me an email, I love hearing from readers. (Tell me your troubles, I don’t judge.): notblueatall@notblueatall.com

You Can Surprise Even Yourself

April15
I’m a lifelong sufferer of insomnia. I have struggled with sleeplessness since I was twelve years old and I was just starting junior high, and also getting bullied. Even before the PTSD-C that my abuser gifted me not long after (at age fourteen), anxiety must’ve started with me even earlier, likely around five. In any case, it’s usually falling asleep that is the hurdle to get across for me. Of course I’ve tried all the remedies, homemade or over the counter, I’ve mostly shied away from prescriptions, but that’s more due to access than other things. Over the years I have found what works best for me and when to use or not use certain methods.
I have never been what one might call a “morning person”. *Shivers* No one has ever called or mistaken me for one either, I can assure you. Yes, I’ve had a few jobs that required that I begin my shift at an ungodly hour: 6 am. It is one thing to have to wake up at this time, but it is another entirely to have to be up and awake and alive and ready to work and interact with other humans. Perish the thought! But I’ve done it, many times, for many years even. First at a wedding website, then for a quality control company for insurance agencies, and finally at my own cafe. I always managed, in my own odd ways.
When I have had jobs that allowed me to have a weekend off, I always want to sleep in! There is nothing more delightful than relishing in the comfort of one’s own bed. Ahh! Yet I have not once had a bed partner who would agree, hardly fair, I think. Can my next bed partner be all about hanging out in bed?! Ha-ha! Even my puggo likes to get up and have breakfast before the sun comes out before going back to bed again.
I’ve lived on my own a good long while now and for sure every weekend I do sleep in. I may get up a couple of times, but I’ll go back each time to fully commit to that good weekend morning sleep! An ex-boyfriend didn’t understand it, my ex-husband felt much the same way, but it is a type of rest that only comes when there’s no anticipation of an alarm clock or obligation.
To my own utter amazement I did not sleep in this weekend, at all! It wasn’t planned and I had no intention of getting up and starting the day so early, but on both days of this past weekend I was up and dressed and doing things before 8 am! I do tend to go to bed early on Friday evenings, but that’s never caused me to wake up early before! Ha-ha! Perhaps I’m at a point where my sleep cycle is no longer running on a continuous deficit? I can’t be sure.
On Saturday I don’t think it even registered how early I was up or maybe I just didn’t want to acknowledge it. It wasn’t until Sunday, as I was at the checkout line at Trader Joe’s, the last stop of my errands, when I looked at my phone with astonishment: 9:28 am. I had already made three previous stops. I couldn’t believe my own eyes and just sort of stood there dumbfounded for a moment, but then it was my turn to check out so I snapped out of it. Ha-ha! It was a strange feeling, though, to feel good and be doing things and yet have it all feel as though it’s not you doing it?! Hard to explain.
I think I’m in a phase of some sort, of possibly shedding some old ways. Can only be good, I’m certain. On Saturday I had made sure to take care of some things that would allow me to feel less stress and to set myself up for a better week ahead, too. I didn’t get around to washing my bedding, but I may just do that tonight. The best part is that it doesn’t matter at all, not one bit! There is no one it affects but myself and I don’t have any sort of need or care about such things, only a fleeting fancy here and there.
Oh I did get a lovely pot of chrysanthemums (white with yellow centers) and a small mint plant that I promptly added to my lil’ garden/planter box. I forgot to snap a photo, but it’s not much to look at just yet. It did make me happy though, to be in the morning sunshine for a few minutes, massage living things into the dirt. And I had started to write again, more poetry/rant-y type stuff, in a notebook that day and kind of kept it going through Sunday.
I feel good. About all this, about my life right now. I have worries, but I think things will work out just fine. They always do somehow. I feel that I have let some internal notions go and this has given me new strength or motivation. I don’t always want to hide from the sun, the world. I do enjoy the more gentle rays of late morning or early evening. If that ain’t a metaphor for my life I am not sure what is?! Ha! I just know that, as troubling as things have been, better, so much better, is on the horizon…for all of us.
Let us each dig deep into the earth, into ourselves, and free up what has been tethering or weighing us down. We can choose to let go and lift ourselves up, even and especially if it feels funny in the moment. I can’t truly explain the serenity I felt this past weekend, but it’s wholly my own and that is fucking priceless!
We do not have to carry habits that no longer serve us. We do not have to follow suit, simply because “that’s how it’s always been”. We can choose to step away and observe and decide for ourselves what is right, what feels best for ourselves now. Do not give thought or concern to what was. As the dead leaves have nourished the soil beneath the trees from whence they came, so too can you feed your roots and give yourself and your life a new chance to bloom into the life and garden of your own creation.
Rad Fatty Love to ALL,

<3
S

P.S. Check out and use the hashtag: #FatAndFree on Instagram & Facebook!

Check out the Fat AF podcast on your favorite podcast app for all things fat sex with me and my BFF, Michaela! (You can listen straight from the web, too!)

Donate to this blog here: https://www.paypal.me/notblueatall

My blog’s Facebook page for things I share that aren’t on this blog (updated daily): http://on.fb.me/1A18fAS 

Or get the same “shared” content on Twitter: @NotBlueAtAll

Are you on MeWe? I started a fat-feminist group there called, Rad Fatties Unlimited, look for it!

I also have an Instagram, though I don’t post much, I have been trying to: https://instagram.com/notblueatall/

And as always, please feel free to drop me a line in comments here or write me an email, I love hearing from readers. (Tell me your troubles, I don’t judge.): notblueatall@notblueatall.com

A Night Out for SmoJoe’s!

April13

If you were to ask me at random if I like musicals I will tell you that I do not. I may add a caveat of, “except for Hello Dolly and JC Superstar” but even that is rare. In fact I actually cannot stand at all the way modern broadway vocals sound, it’s all very nasally and obnoxious to me. We all have our preferences, though, so it’s whatever, ya know? I have been incredibly fortunate to have a BFF who is also a skilled and talented (yes, both!) actor, dancer, singer, choreographer, writer, and director. They’re kind of a big deal! Over the last twenty years I have seen most of the shows they have been in or directed. I say most because they were in a million shows in 2017 and I know I missed at least two! Ha-ha!

The very first show I saw Jery perform in was Seven Brides for Seven Brothers and it made me see them in a new light. Now I’ve seen a ton of their shows over the years, but the stand out favorites have been JC Superstar, their Judas was unparalleled and just blew me away, West Side Story, the production wasn’t great but their Chino brought tears to everyone’s eyes I swear, White Christmas, ohmigosh I don’t even like Christmas but I cried my dumb face off at the end of that one they were so damned amazing in it, and then my memory gets hazy. I recall some plays they were in that were incredible to watch, titles escape me but one was for MACLA a local org and another at the San Jose Mexican Heritage Plaza Theater, both were sublime. I can honestly say that their theater resume is varied and rich with content!

It has been an honor and a privilege to see someone I know and love and drink with often evolve and grow and flourish in their abilities. Even when the show wasn’t great, their performance proved a shining beacon no one could deny. Catch me if you can was a delightful romp and a bit different than what I had seen them in previously. Several years ago I recall seeing them perform in a revue-like show called Smokey Joe’s Cafe and I had no idea how much I would love it. That production had built a story line into it, but I honestly didn’t notice! Ha-ha! I was so dazzled by well dressed men singling splendidly and dancing around on stage. And I knew all the songs! That had never happened before. I truly loved it. When they told me last year that they would be directing and choreographing Smokey Joe’s Cafe this year I was stoked!

When my BFF from Ohio came to visit we had no idea we’d get the exceptional opportunity to see Jery’s production of SmoJoe’s, as it is oft referred, the night before it opened! Wow! What a treat! Y’all! We were fucking blown away! The caliber of talent in the cast was beyond compare. Not just in vocals, but the dancing! SO MUCH DANCING! I was blissed the fuck out, lemme tell ya! Ha-ha! I just love seeing people dance and that choreography was so fun! I noticed some lil’ easter eggs, if you will, he’d thrown in there. Maybe not just for me, but a few of ’em felt like it. Ha! (J you know which move I’m referring to! Ha!) After seeing so many shows and even this same show before you’d think I’d be tough to impress at this point, and I might agree with you. However, Jery is a seasoned professional with great vision and a rich pool of talent from which to build his show!

Of course I would have preferred to see them in the show singing and dancing too, but seeing the end result was nothing short of awesome. I must admit it was a bit of a treat, though kinda wrong, to see them anxious and sweating bullets before opening night. I just so rarely see that side of them and always feel like a complete mess myself. Ha-ha! That’s what friends are for, right?! Everything went off without a hitch and anyone who saw the show gushed about its greatness, I can assure you! I was lucky enough to see it twice! I love a good opening gala!

They will likely hate me for posting this picture but I fucking love the hell out of it and I hope they get that part before the self deprecating thoughts/comments begin.

I kind of love “bad” pics of myself at this point…but I really love this outfit! 

One of the shining stars of the show, Tony Gonzales, and their ever-espressive face! Ohmigosh! When the group sang “Ying Yang” Tony’s face was the whole show! Ha-ha!

These are Tony’s precious puppers dressed for the opening gala reception and to theme in their poodle skirts! Too cute!

After the show was the gala reception with champagne and h’ordeuvres and all the chatting and laughter you can imagine. It’s always a great time, but for me especially because it means I’m hanging and chatting and drinkin’ champers with my two BFFs! J’s spouse P never misses a show…or the rum balls! Ha-ha! With all of the hustle and bustle in the lobby slowly dying down, some of the cast and it’s illusive director popped back onto the stage for a quick celebratory Sake Bomb, only with cider instead of beer. J had asked if I could take a quick video of it for them and I said, “Of course…if you’ll snap some pics of me at this bar right now!” and so…

That’s me on stage, hanging out at Smokey Joe’s Cafe! During the show the shelves were all lit up beautifully!

I highly recommend supporting your local theater. You may even be surprised to find that you like musicals after all, as I did. Ha-ha!

Rad Fatty Love to ALL,

<3
S

P.S. Check out and use the hashtag: #FatAndFree on Instagram & Facebook!

Check out the Fat AF podcast on your favorite podcast app for all things fat sex with me and my BFF, Michaela! (You can listen straight from the web, too!)

Donate to this blog here: https://www.paypal.me/notblueatall

My blog’s Facebook page for things I share that aren’t on this blog (updated daily): http://on.fb.me/1A18fAS 

Or get the same “shared” content on Twitter: @NotBlueAtAll

Are you on MeWe? I started a fat-feminist group there called, Rad Fatties Unlimited, look for it!

I also have an Instagram, though I don’t post much, I have been trying to: https://instagram.com/notblueatall/

And as always, please feel free to drop me a line in comments here or write me an email, I love hearing from readers. (Tell me your troubles, I don’t judge.): notblueatall@notblueatall.com

Subscriptions: From Ipsy to BoxyCharm! (And more!)

April11

I love getting a lil’ surprise in my mailbox each month. It helps break up the monotony of life, I think. Or at least the monotony of bills and junk mail! Ha-ha! My all-time favorite subscription and piece of mail each month is definitely the Feminist Sticker Club (dot com). For $2.50 a month I get an awesome, feminist sticker. I love to slip them under my phone’s clear-soft case so it feels like I have a new case each month. I have tried a couple of other subscription boxes but have since canceled them.

I tried one called Lip Monthly that was, I believe, $12.99 but you got 5 lip products each month. I’m addicted to lip stuff! I canceled because you couldn’t ever choose a color palette or share your preferences. I kept getting things too brown or too orange for my complexion. The other one I tried was How 2 B a redhead. It seemed like just the thing for me, redheaded and all, but alas, it was greatly disappointing and seemed to be geared more towards non-natural redheads. While the box itself seemed a great value, you got a lot of stuff for the price you paid (there were different levels), it just wasn’t for me.

I have subscribed to the Ipsy glam bag for nearly two years. I have a tidy stack of their zipper pouches that have proven to be quite helpful when in need and still cute to look at when left on their own. It was always so fun to get something just for me in the mail each month. I would get excited to open the shiny, hot pink envelope each month. Lately, though, I had started to get a bit bored with what they were sending and even when I did like something, the tiny size was a bit of a downer. So I put my membership on “pause” for a couple of months.

Last month I heard about a similar subscription box, but with full sized beauty products. Curious, I decided to give it a shot and ordered their “FOMO” box, because I had missed the date to be included in the initial April shipment, they sent what was worded like it was leftovers, but what I got was very impressive…

A gorgeous Tarte cosmetics palette in the metallic nudes everyone is gaga for these days. I loved the mermaid theme of the compact itself and the big mirror inside. A fun glitter top coat type lip gloss. “Better than sex” mascara by Too Faced, I’d heard about this stuff for ages! And two gorgeous rose gold toned brushes that feel so luxurious! I was blown away by this first box!

Then just the other day I got my second BoxyCharm box! O-M-Z! More gorgeousness! I am once again beyond impressed and may be hooked! This one included a PUR palette in fun and much needed colors (sorry forgot to get a pic of the inside). A stunner of a highlighter (bottom right). My favorite lip gloss in a color I didn’t have already by Steve Laurent (this is my third now). And 3 makeup brushes that I have already found to be exactly what I was missing from my collection! Just wow!

For $21 this is still a massive bargain, even if I only loved one product! The full size means I no longer need to fiddle with tiny-sample sized eye shadow pots that never seemed to stay shut or won’t open at all. These subscriptions have helped me save so much money, too! How? Well, I am very fond of Walgreen’s and would often “just pop in real quick” and come out $40-$60 later, more than once a month! Ugh! That’s not even mentioning my oft Target visits, no idea what I spend there on this type of thing because it all goes in the cart with everything else. No more! Not only am I not seduced by fancy displays and sales ads, but I’m getting better quality products, too!

Now, there are some things I enjoy greatly, maybe even obsessively, that simply do not come in a subscription. I have been living on tidbits from Trader Joe’s and I refuse to feel an ounce of shame about it. Their prices are sublime and it’s great for my spinster life since most things are not in giant packages. A recent indulgence was their herbed goat cheese log with these Fig & Olive crisps, soooooo good! It feels fancy, even thought it was like $6 total!

And this prosecco from Trader Joe’s is always in my fridge, I promise. I even created my very own signature drink: The Pro-Mosa! Prosecco + Peach Juice = Divine! This prosecco is only $5.99 a bottle at my local TJ’s (yours may differ, of course). I get this and their Dixie Peach juice and it lasts awhile. So tasty, so refreshing! I used to love their Newton’s Folly cider, but it now comes in a can and tastes nasty. Oh well. Pro-Mosa life for me!

What stuff are you into lately? What are you obsessed with or excited about? What am I missing out on? What subscriptions do you enjoy? Tell me! Ha-ha!

Rad Fatty Love to ALL,

<3
S


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