Last night on my long drive home from work, I was listening to KPFA (as per my usual) and heard a report where they were talking about food banks and pantries and how the face of poverty is changing. The middle class is dwindling right into poverty and how we’re not prepared for this major change. There is an ordinance up for vote in Los Angeles that would make it easier for local business to donate foods that are still good without threat of legal repercussions. Basically, the food and safety regulations currently in place do not allow for this because of set time guidelines or other guidelines that dictate how long a certain food may be kept/stored/served. This is why grocery stores often have to throw out perfectly good food, if they didn’t they could be sued for a number of reasons. This new ordinance would cost the state/city/fed zero dollars and actually cut waste that would otherwise head straight to our landfills.

Well, all of this got me thinking about that changing “face of poverty” and an idea/image popped into my head that made me catch my breath, think and just feel pretty sick overall. I also think it’s a real thing and could happen and well, LA isn’t exactly the fat friendliest place on earth, but…

Can you imagine a fat standing in line for food at a food bank or soup kitchen? Would they be harassed? Would they be refused? I cannot imagine. I don’t know what it is like to have to rely on said food banks and pantries, but I am happy as hell that they are out there to help people who are food insecure. I had never heard that turn of phrase either: food insecure. I get what it means, but never heard it that way before. I mean, when I was a kid, I was just poor. My family never went on well fare or received food stamps, but we probably would have qualified and probably should have. Luckily we were often helped/supported by my grandma.

What about the mom trying to feed her kids? Is she going to be more reluctant because of her size? Doesn’t she work hard enough? Man, I just can’t fathom it. You know? But there are assholes out there who just make it their life’s mission to be a dick to any and all that they possibly can.

My thoughts, love and hope go with you!

If you’d like to hear the broadcast I heard yesterday:

In regards to this post Socially Fat , it was recommended by a great friend and commenter that I x-post to an LJ community. I did and the response was an impressive tale of online dating adventures and failures (not on the part of the responder, mind you). She mentions that many guys she met were under the impression that “Fat Girls Are Easy.” Of course the first thing that came to mind was the fabulously cheesy 1989 film “Earth Girls Are Easy.” I know, it wasn’t intended and I know what she means as I have encountered this way of thinking myself in various moments of my life. But then I began to see some strange parallels. Forgive my tangent, but I think I have something here…

Man, I love that movie! I could not tell you how many times I’ve seen it if I tried. And I was a valley girl, still am I guess. I mean, if I get particularly excited about something, I slip right back into the verbiage and everything. Just need to Aquanet my bangs, put on the jelly bracelets and I am there! Ha! I had wanted to be a hair stylist back then, too. Though I also was convinced I’d be the greatest Pop star ever “Blaze” was going to be my stage name. Ugh! *bows head in shame*

The movie was about a gal whose relationship is falling apart after she catches her doctor boyfriend sleeping with a female nurse. And hilarity ensues, but then it doesn’t. This movie is truly about a girl who has been betrayed by the man she loves and at first she wants him back, that is until she meets three fine strangers who distract her and show her that there’s more to life than some jerk of a boyfriend. Her BFF played by Julie Brown (not the “Downtown” one, either, the Original!) is there to help her along the way and give the three strangers a brilliant valley-esque makeover. The result? More hilarity but also a slowly brewing romance.

One could easily compare the “aliens” to fats in this plot. You see, a fat in a valley dating scenario would easily be considered alien. And certainly any salon-a-tron would jump at the chance to makeover a fatty! Always seems to be someone around to transform a fatty, be it on t.v. or movies or what have you. There was nothing wrong with the strangers when they arrived, but in this valley world they simply don’t fit in. So they emerge as the salon-a-tron’s ultimate success as these hairless, hipster dorks (in my opinion). Suddenly the main gal played by Geena Davis in full glam valley-osity, sees them in a whole new light! Suddenly these strangers/aliens/fatties are A-OK because they fit in her version of the norm.

This film makes no bones about the fact that the women in this “valley” are quick to bed only the hottest of hotties and thus you see many a scene of flirtation and so on. Everything seems to revolve around sex, even when it doesn’t. While Geena Davis’ character seems a bit on the light-headed side, she does “get it” eventually and beds Jeff Goldblum’s character. After which she is of course in love and cannot be without him. Because, of course, sex = love for ladies, right? Um, not exactly.

Here’s the thing, everyone is an individual. Every person is a multi-faceted personality with varying emotions and experiences and thoughts. Amazingly, this applies to fatties, too! Yep! Incredibly, just like “normal” gals, fatties, too have different ideas and experiences and feelings on any given subject. And when it comes to sex? Yeah, we’re not all the same in that arena either. I have actually been both the prude and the slut in my lifetime and now fall somewhere in between. I’m a unique individual. Fun! I get to have my own ideas and opinions and go about my life in a different way (than most).

So, when I heard this “Fat Girls Are Easy” thing again I thought about it awhile. And just like a lot of people think that blonds are dumb and redheads are feisty (I so f-ing hate that stereotype, yo!) fatties are not necessarily easy. YOU GUYS!!! Fatties are unique individuals, too! Being fat is no more or less a descriptor than being tall or having long hair. Yet somewhere along the way in our civilization (or more to the point U.S. society) fatties have become the aliens and must be changed! They must fit into some pre-labeled concept of we just can’t deal as a society.

Well, FUCK THAT! I refuse to fit into any category. Wait! Unless Bad-Ass-Punk-Fat-Awesome is a category? No? Okay, then FUCK THAT! Ha-ha! I won’t compare anyone to a fucking snow flake, but dude! DUDE! We are all unique, no two are alike and while we may have some traits in common with someone else, just being fat does not make me or anyone else a slut by proxy! Yes, I’ve been treated like a one night stand when all I was looking for was love. Yes, I’ve treated guys like a one night stand when they just wanted to get to know me better. This doesn’t mean anything about anyone else but me. I hate to keep harping on this, buy you guys? This stereotype won’t kill itself. We have to actively remind people that not only are we human, but we are our own people and can make our own choices. DAMN!

Thanks for hanging in there for my “Earth Girls Are Easy” comparison. Hopefully it came across as intended.

IMDB info on the film: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0097257/

Reading one of my favorite blogs of all time www.TheRotund.com today Marianne posted about a link that was shared with her and her horror at what this link informed her of. The link: http://www.thehastingscenter.org/Bioethicsforum/Post.aspx?id=4730&blogid=140

Her fabulously written post (and seriously, y’all should just be reading this): http://www.therotund.com/?p=861

How to explain this simply? Well, this Pediatric Urologist basically surgically removes part of little girls’ clits that are larger than average. This is an elective surgery that is performed with the parents permission. The girls are very young (5 or 6 years old) and thus have not fully developed, so who knows if their clits will eventually be larger than average or not. What’s more shocking is this doctor’s follow-up procedures and testing. I’d rather not get into it, but please go to one or both links for a better and fuller description. I’m far too disgusted at the moment to reiterate it here. Ugh! Vile sack of human filth I think that this “doctor” is. I cannot imagine in what situation a parent would think that this is the right thing to do. I feel for these little girls and hope that someone will stop this guy sooner rather than later!

And the directory for Cornell University with the Dr’s info as well as the Dean’s: http://www.med.cornell.edu/cgi-bin/phf

Yeah, sounds weird to me, too. But it gets weirder!
You see, “Karen” started out at 129 lbs and 5’4″. Um, that’s pretty slim on it’s own.
But see, the headline mentions “Healthy” and so I read on…(link to full article at the end of this post)

She had gained a total of 21 lbs. during a difficult and tragic period in her life. You see, she had never been more than 107 lbs. her entire adult life. Realizing that this wasn’t such a dramatic thing, she notes having “a very small frame.”

Look, I’m not calling shenanigans on this lady, I respect the fact that she didn’t feel healthy and decided to make a change in her life to get back to what she was used to. We all go through things in life that leave us feeling the need to change. I get that completely and have been there a few times myself. What I am calling bullshit on is this article.  I just don’t see how this lady losing 21 lbs is such news! I’ve known plenty of people who have lost 20 or 30 or 40 or 50 pounds. No one wrote an article about them!

And what about 3-5 years later on when most people have not only gained back what they lost, but more?! I don’t know that this would happen to “Karen” but for most of the human population, this is what happens, 98% of the time! I like that she mentions not worrying about a “number on a scale” and not focusing on a specific amount to lose. Rather she chose to simply become more active and get back to eating and cooking the things she loved. That is great! I personally think that more people should cook at home if they are able, because doing so absolutely gives you a better perspective on what you’re putting into your body.

Look, I don’t know why an article was written about this lady. I’m happy for her and wish her the best. I just don’t see how this is “news” or any sort of revelation what so ever. But, wev.

http://www.thatsfit.com/2010/06/14/karen-started-taking-care-of-herself-and-now-shes-a-size-2/?icid=main|main|dl5|link4|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.thatsfit.com%2F2010%2F06%2F14%2Fkaren-started-taking-care-of-herself-and-now-shes-a-size-2%2F

http://www.aolhealth.com/2010/06/16/obese-woman-lack-sex-partners-more-likely-to-get-pregnant-accidentally/?icid=main|main|dl3|link4|http%3A%2F%2Fwww.aolhealth.com%2F2010%2F06%2F16%2Fobese-woman-lack-sex-partners-more-likely-to-get-pregnant-accidentally%2F

Headline:

News Obese Woman Lack Sex Partners; More Likely to Get Pregnant Accidentally

While I appreciate the article’s use of the word fat more than obese, the rest of this article is pure rubbish! The fact that they say things like this, “Maybe women are more tolerant of tubby husbands than men are of tubby wives” says a lot to me. It’s all bullshit! I am a fat woman, not sure what my BMI# is, let’s say it’s 5,000; and I can assure you that I have never been in want of a sex partner in my life! I’m not entirely sure what the point of the study was. I mean, they site many factors like: researchers found that obese women were less likely to ask for birth control services, and thus, four times more likely to accidentally get pregnant. Pregnant fat women and their babies also faced a higher risk of complications and death than normal-weight women.

WTF?! Look, I cannot speak for the citizen of France, but in the US, well, I don’t have statistics, just my own life experiences. Still, my friends and I have never been shy about getting our birth control! And regardless of this I am appalled about the accidental pregnancy thing. I have worked very hard to be a responsible person and have stuck to my guns about not having kids until I’m ready (mentally &  financially). I suppose condoms aren’t a good enough birth control method or are simply ignored in this study? Why only address this issue for obese women? Ugh! It’s maddening!

While I agree that doctors need to get over their own issues (the article says embarrassment, as if?!) and ask the more difficult questions of their patients, what really needs to happen is for doctors to get over their own prejudices about fat people and treat them equally! Because some doctors see someone of my size and honestly ASSUME that I am not having sex. HA! That is a load of laughs! Trust me  guys, I am and I’m loving it!

“This is not a heart attack or a stroke…but it’s an important quality of life factor and a public health problem,” since when is sex equal in it’s “public health problem” label as a friggin’ heart attack?! Should I alert the FDA/CDC anytime I have a sexual drought? I had no idea they cared!

“It seems like a no-brainer,” he said. “If you lose weight, you will feel more attractive and that could improve your sex life.” Too bad there isn’t a permanent or successful weight loss program in existence that won’t shorten my life span or far far worse. UGH! Seriously? Doctors & scientists are saying this shit, guys! It’s ridiculous! Yet somehow this stuff is in the “news” every damned day. I feel plenty attractive NOW! When I was smaller no one told me I should be a model. Now at 300+lbs? Yes, someone said this to me yesterday! I have never felt better in my life! I have energy, I get shit done and I live a fantastic, while humble in it’s luxuries, life!

Just once I’d really love for some truth to get into the “news!”