I'm just a fat gal with a blog and an opinion. Well, lots of opinions.

I Bought A Bike!


I found it on ye olde Craigslist and just couldn’t pass it up! It’s a SCHWINN “Jaguar” Ladies!!! I love it and got it for a steal and it’s a solid, steel frame thing. The guy repairs bikes all of the time and sells them, even offered additional services if I needed. Super cool!

PhotobucketI have wanted a bike for about four years, but always talked myself out of it. First, the money was always tight, still it but like I said the price was right as well as the timing. Next was the visibility of it, I mean, you’re like just out there! And the thing I still haven’t gotten over and perhaps won’t for some time: Fear of injury! I am still dealing with pain and stiffness in my knees. One is more stiff/sore while the other is a pulled hamstring. Neither seem to heal and I personally think that living upstairs only exacerbates them daily. I remember just a couple of months ago running around with my Puggyman in the morning or being able to sprint out to the front lawn for our walk. Ugh!

But you know what? All of that still isn’t enough to keep me from getting a bike! Because I have stopped giving a damn what other people think, I want to do what makes me happy and it has been twenty…Yes, you read that right…TWENTY YEARS since I’d been on a bike! And I fully intend to Glam-up my bike, too! I want to paint it to match this helmet…which I must have:

Nutcase Swirl Bike Helmet
When I showed it to my husband he said it looked like a jawbreaker…so now I have to have it! It’s just so fun and seriously? It would totes go with any damned thing I could possibly wear! And if I love the helmet I will want to wear it and use it and the bike itself. The bike even fits in the backseat of my car with some minor finagling. I can’t believe it though…I HAVE A BIKE!!!
I was mega nervous when the guy brought the bike out and said I should take it for a spin. Twenty years?! *DeepBreath* I did it and asked him to lower the seat, then again, then raise the handlebars…he did this all with no question or issue what so ever. Really nice dude. And then it felt better. Not quite right, I mean how could it on the first go, but it fit/was comfy enough that I felt confident buying it on the spot. Well, I asked that he help me get it in my car, which again he did without hesitation. Then he showed me how to take off the front tire and quick-release brakes. So cool! The step-through frame makes all of the difference, especially with my knee.
I will start out in the parking lot of my apartment building and hopefully soon get the courage to venture out into our neighborhood. I’m to going to pressure myself. I recall playing tennis with my husband years ago and getting so upset with myself for not being as good as when I was on the Jr. USTA. Which is silly, I realize that now. Your brain remembers your body being able to do things, but your body without practice easily forgets. I will be patient and just try to enjoy the ride.
This is such a dream come true! I can’t truly explain it just yet. I don’t want to use the word liberating. I just…I dunno! Ha-ha! I’m giddy, that much is certain! I practically lived on my bike as a kid. I rode all over town and even to neighboring ones. It was my faithful steed no matter how I felt or where I wanted to go. I never named a bike before, but this one feels so special and the feelings I’m having about it, too.
Have you been holding yourself back from something for years? Why? What’s holding you back? Let’s talk about it!

It’s The Simple Things…


That can make you feel so friggin’ awesome!!!

Like my tried and true pug-love, he is such a snuggle:

One dollar fingerless gloves from Target, you know those magical dollar bins when you walk in:

New tube of mascara, I am loving Maybelline’s Falsies Flared, just tried the “Drama Black”:

Volum' Express® The Falsies™ Black Drama Waterproof Mascara - Pack Shot

New lip stain for cheap, that claims it is “smooch proof” we’ll just have to see about that:


I’m wearing the “Berry Long Time” in the third photo above…I love the color!

Funky sneaker that reminded me of my niece, so I had to have them…they make me feel like a kid and a bad ass:

WomensAirwalkWomen's Tatum Graffiti Skate

What simple things make you feel awesome? Share! <3



Random Outfit Post is Random


So last Friday, you know the shopping one, my friend Jeanette and I decided to hang out. I was feeling funky, fresh, dope and fly and so I put together an outfit I’d never worn before. Not only that, the top I didn’t even pick out. Someone at Cupcakes and Muffintops insisted it is too cute for me not to get and so I bought it without even trying it on. It was that cute! But it took me months before I attempted to wear it and until this particular Friday, I hadn’t found a way to work it. The cardigan has a similar story. I’d purchased it for a steal at Target on clearance, but it’s ivory and what am I doing with an ivory cardigan? I get things dirty without even trying! It has this lovely deco-esque square latticework on the front…just fabulous, which is why I bought it of course. Never in my dreams had I thought of these two cherished but unworn pieces together…but they do, perfectly:

And I started rocking my “pomp” again. Which I am quite enjoying. I am sick of my shortie hair in the back, but I am hopeful and patient that they will get to growin’ soon here. I wasn’t sure what color glasses to wear, so I went with my usual/casual/go-to pair of dark purple. You can hardly see, but I’m wearing the earrings and necklace set my then fiance bought me 6 months before our wedding. I hadn’t worn the necklace in ages and I love it’s simple elegance. And of course my usual Avenue denim lite straight leg jeans. I am loathe to even imagine the day I need to buy new jeans. I have five pair of these and wear them constantly. They are thin and have stretch. I buy them a size bigger than I should, but I never have to unbutton them and they are the perfect length this way. They are discontinued though, so yeah, they better last forever. Ha-ha!

The Puggyman doesn’t like his picture taken. Always a suspicious eye when the camera is out:

I had never gone black Friday shopping, truly. I’d always worked on such days for my many years of retail. Jeanette and I only went to Avenue, but it was fun! No crowds, no rude clerks, it was fabulous. For a grand total of twenty-six dollars, I made out like a bandit: Two free tote bags*, one pair of leg warmers, one printed henley, one black henly, one pair of glam earrings and one pair of sock-slippers. And the tote bags are nice, too! It was not only the best black Friday experience I’d ever had, but it was the best Avenue experience, too! I will say that I am super disappointed and a bit angry that they no longer carry EE tights…not even on their website, except for the plainest of plain ones. I did order a pair of the sweater tights in an E, but they haven’t come yet, so fingers crossed that they fit. This shopping trip was a hoot and a half, too. Jeanette and I tried on shoes and played with accessories and she got so many cute things, too! Then it was decided that these were the sexiest and most glam shoes ever! But I insist that we find the exact same style, or similar, in a flat. I refuse to suffer for such beauty. We tried them on and made up stories of our would-be glamorous lives, had we these magical shoes and finally put them away with a catch in our throats…if you know of a similar shoe in a flat? DO EMAIL ME! Ha-ha! *I made two separate purchases, thus earning two free with purchase tote bags.

Plus Size Grace Glitter Bow Pump image

TMI Tuesday!!!


This TMI Tuesday post is a review of a Sex Toy! If this doesn’t interest you, you’d rather not know about my sex life or toy preference, or you’re at work and don’t wanna get in trouble, do come back tomorrow for your regularly scheduled random fatty talk right here on my blog-a-ma-thing. Thanks! <3








Every time I go to Good Vibrations in San Francisco, I try to buy something. To support them, to support my sexual well being and well, it’s an awesome place to shop. I find it hard not to look around and grab a little something before I leave. There are a bunch of reasons to go to and support Good Vibrations, but you can find those at the linky there. Today I wanted to talk about the latest toy I purchased.

The C-Spot Vibrator - Click to enlarge
Meet “C-Spot”: The C-Spot has a very special job indeed — its main function is as a clit stimulator, and wow, is it good at its job! Long and thin, the head is angled for the perfect fit on your clit. Slim enough to fit in between bodies during partnered sex, this little vibe also provides an extended reach for folks with disabilities. Not limited to external fun, this vibe also makes a great internal G-spot stimulator. Oh, and it’s waterproof too!
For 22 bucks I snagged up this slim and angled toy. It’s basically a schmancy vibrator…except it’s angled and designed in such a way that it can make clit stimulation either solo or with a partner, fun! I waited to share my personal experience because I’d wanted to try it with a partner and it took me a few days to buy AAA batteries, I thought I had some. Ha-ha!
I’ve tried other schmancy vibes before and they all have their qualities and faults. I had not tried to use them during partner sex and hadn’t even considered it due to my frustrations at the design of said toys. The “C-Spot”, however, did surprise me! For one thing, it’s SLIM! I wouldn’t really recommend it for insertion/penetrative play at all. It just wouldn’t do  much. For masturbating it is perfection! Just the right amount of vibration, not too strong or too weak. I’ve had both ends of that spectrum and would prefer the middle ground. And the “C-Spot” does have an easy to use speed control. Having said that though, the design of the speed control is a bit funny. If you’ve got your hands in motion, as it were, it’s difficult to adjust the speed without stopping all together and adjusting accordingly. Do that a few times and you could kill the mood. That and if you have any lube on your fingers you may not be able to adjust the dial without wiping/drying them first.
Okay, now let’s talk about using this bad boy during partner sex! This was my first go at it, actually. I’d used the “C-Spot” on my own once, but then wanted to see if it really was designed for partner play…and it is! It was such a cinch to slip it between us in a modified missionary position, which was tons of fun. And even while on all fours, perfection! I will say that it was a bit difficult at first to find a good spot to put the rounded/angled tip with all of the moving around and all, but once I did: magic! I love the length of this thing, too! I didn’t feel like I had T-Rex arms for once and actually felt I had some room to move around and experiment with it.
So far this is my favorite vibe! I still like/enjoy my “Lucid Dreams” for solo play and g-spot stimulation, but the “C-Spot” is all I need for a quick self-care session and quite fun for partner sex, too! Actually, I just tried out using the “C-Spot” and “Lucid Dreams” together and I have to say: Awesome!!! I have no deal breaking complaints as I did with the “butterfly kiss.” I recommend this toy for anyone with short arms, fatties who have reaching issues like me and those looking for a little extra something while having penetrative sex, too!
As always, I’d love to hear from you! Do you have a favorite toy? Do you use it during partner sex? What made you buy your last toy? It’s TMI Tuesday, so go ahead, lay it on me! <3

I Can Has Teggings?!


We all can! Woo! It’s true! Re/Dress NYC now offers teggings and more on their website:

I’d longed for some teggings since I first heard Marriane of mention them in a podcast. I think I even waxed philosophically with Golda about it in my own podcast! Ha-ha! I lusted after them like they were some sort of lost treasure that only a few were privy of it’s whereabouts.

No more! While at the Cupcakes & Muffintops event in Oakland, the ever flabulous Marilyn Wann allowed, neigh, invited me to touch and stretch her hot pink pair of teggings…and I did with great delight! It was at that moment I was convinced that I required them for sure. And so I ordered myself three pair: Dark red, Hot pink and Black!

Today was the first day that I wore them. And can I just say that they will absolutely fit almost anyone! I have 63″ hips and there is plenty of room for more! They are thicker than tights, thinner than leggings and stretchy as hell! I love ’em! I will say the crotch thing is always an issue for me, but it’s not terrible in these as the fabric isn’t at all binding. Yay! The waistband doesn’t roll. They stay up quite nicely. I have no complaints at all. This is shocking and flabulous!

This first pic shows the see-through-ness of them with my knees all bent and stuff:

This one is just standing there, you know, lookin’ good, I guess:

Teggings from Re/Dress $18, Dress from Ross (Dress For Less $10), Belt Torrid (2/$5 dealio), Headband Ross $4, Necklace Kohl’s…I think that’s it! Ha! I’m not so good at remembering these things.

I am quite pleased with these and I hope you will be too! I give them my fullest endorsement. No, I’m not being paid, though I would gladly take more teggings as payment for this glowing review (more colors!). Ha-ha! Thanks for reading.


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