NotBlueAtAll

I'm just a fat gal with a blog and an opinion. Well, lots of opinions.

Bananas!

January5

Yesterday morning before I headed to the café I hit the grocery store for the freshest possible bagels and believe me, they’re worth it! I was grabbing all kinds of goodies for the café including bread and milk and bananas; the usual. Later that day when I placed the bananas on their hanger-dealy I noticed a different sticker than the usual “Dole 4011” one. This one was a bright green one that said in large letters, “LOSE Weight” with “see www.dolebananadiet.com” under it. This instantly pissed me off, but I was just too darn busy to think on it, so I let it go until I could get my thoughts together.

With the New Year and all of its festivities over and traditions wearing thin on my nerves this week I decided to address this directly. It’s worse than ever, this year’s obsession with:

New Year’s resolutions = lose weight now you fucking fatty!

I can’t even listen to either of my fave morning radio shows because everything is about fucking weight loss. Hmm…funny how the failure rate for all of these programs, diets, lifestyle changes, gym memberships, shakes, pills, laxatives, Biggest Loser Treadmill, etc. is somehow still the same old 98% it’s always been. But don’t people know this? How could they not?

I don’t know a single person who’s had a significant weight loss (20 + lbs.) that they have kept off more than two years let alone five or more. I don’t know if I believe that this mythical creature even exists. What I do know is that the insatiable marketing machine longs for this time of year and truly outdoes itself come January with outlandish statements and claims. All in the name of…health? Really? Are you kidding me? Okay, that is a joke, right? Ugh!

Look, there is no Obesity Research Institute and not all fatties eat all the damned time. Nor do they only eat crap (although there are plenty of people from all walks of life that do these things fat or not). Please, I beg of you, please do not fall for a single one of these idiotic ads! I honestly believe that if you are happy in your life you won’t even care what size you are. I mean, perfect doesn’t exist and if it did it certainly wouldn’t lie within a homo-sapien! I mean, in the grand scheme of things, we’re nasty beasts!

All of this faux vanity and the preying upon our insecurities is such obvious bullshit, but somehow this industry still gets fed billions of our hard earned dollars…money that we could be spending on health care or insurance or some other fucked up industry to leach every last cent from us. Right?! Are people spending their cash on “Alli” instead of paying their bills or feeding their children? Because if one person is doing that I would like to personally fucking slap them!

It makes me sick and sad to consider all of the young women growing up right now (I hate “coming of age” it’s just so “sexually active” sounding to me). With all of their fave celebs and role models OD-ing and flashing their cooch or doing strip teases in front of kids…you get the picture, yes? It’s gross and sad. In a world of “Girls Gone Wild” and “Hooters” it’s hard enough to have lady bits without all of these other pressures and expectations being pressed on them. And before I go into another tirade or tangent, most Americans can’t afford to miss a day of work if they’re violently ill let alone the amount of time necessary to recover from plastic surgery. And that’s just the ones with jobs!

Look, all I am saying is that there are far more important things to do and see and experience in this world that it is just ridiculous that we’re expected to lose weight every year…to what end? I mean, there are plenty of people who don’t “need” to lose weight. And I include myself as one of them! I don’t NEED to do any fucking thing except what keeps me alive! No one is under any moral or social obligation to be a certain size and I am sick of the manipulation that is allowed through advertising. True, it’s not the only industry to use such tactics, but it seems the most nominally successful without much to back up its claims.

Okay…I’ll get off my soap box. For now! Ha!

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posted under Bullshit
2 Comments to

“Bananas!”

  1. On January 5th, 2010 at 7:06 pm j. Says:

    *STANDING OVATION*

    That was brilliantly put!
    “nuff said.

  2. On January 6th, 2010 at 5:47 pm admin Says:

    Aww, thanks.

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